100 Things About Me - My Intro

I was going to write a traditional "Hi...my name is _____ and I have a blog because.."-type post, but isn't that what everyone does? Since I'm not everyone, I figured I would be different and make my first post a "100 Things About Me and My Life" -type post.

Yeah, I know..."100 Things..." is not different either. But making that my Intro post...now THAT'S kinda orginal, right? (Humor me, will ya?)

Anyway, onto the list...

100 Things About Me and My Life

1. I'm a female
2. I'm a black female. Not colored, not African American, not Negro. Black.
3. Technically I am more mocha complected, but let's not split hairs.
4. I'm a black female married to a white male.
5. I'm divorcing the white male.
6. Not because he's white.
7. Not because he's male either.
8. It's because he's a jerk. Always has been -- but back when I still loved him I could ignore and/or tolerate it.
9. I don't ignore and/or tolerate it anymore.
10. I don't love him either.
11. Okay, I lie. I do still love him. I'm just not in love with him anymore. 
12. Yes, there is a difference.
13. I am a mom to a 13-year-old girl named Taylor.
14. I don't call her Taylor. I call her Diva. When she was younger, I called her DIT.
15. DIT = Diva In Training.
16. She graduated to full Diva status when she bacame a teen.
17. Yes, she knows I blog about her.
18. No, she doesn't care. And I know she blogs about me. I think I'm nicer to her in my blog thn she is to me in her blog. But that's okay. She can say whatever she wants about me. It's her blog. I have the link. I could go look if I wanted to. But that wouldn't be fair. She should be free to say whatever she wants about me. Just not to my face.
19. I'm a black mom...I don't play, and you don't DISrespect me to my face.
20. She's a bi-racial (multi-racial really) kid.
21. She's just like me when I was her age.
22. She hates it when I say that.
23. Next year I plan to lose 380lbs.
24. 350lbs. of it is husband.
25. Did I mention he was a jerk?
26. I think I might sound bitter.
27. I'm not bitter. I'm sad.
28. I'm sad he threw away nine years of our lives.
29. I'm also sad that at the point where we were on the verge of having the American Dream, he chose to check out of the relationship.
30. They say it makes two to make a marriage work, and two to ruin it. That's a lie. One person can destroy a marriage. Just ask him. He'll say I did it.
31. The proverbial back-breaking straw was dropped on the camel when my husband said, "I'd rather watch bad tv than have sex with her."
32. He said it on the 4th of July.
33. At our party.
34. In front of all our friends.
35. I'm the "her".
36. Yep. He's about to be back on the market.
37. Ladies, put your checkbooks away. You can't afford him.
38. You don't want him either. Not the way he is now. He wasn't always like this, and hopefully he won't stay this way.
39. He wants me to pay him alimony.
40. Please refer to #8 and #25. Never mind, it bears repeating: he's a jerk.
41. We bought a house last March.
42. He refers to it as "rinky dink".
43. I think it's perfect. I love my house. 3 huge bedrooms, 2.5 baths, full finished basement, nice-sized flat backyard, a living room, formal dining room, eat-in kitchen, family room with a gigantic fireplace, 2-car attached garage and a lovely front porch.  How in the hell is that "rinky dink"?
44. Rich thinks he's jealous. So does Jake. I think they're right.
45. I think he's jealous that I can afford the house without him, but he couldn't afford it without me.
46. Which is why he wants alimony.
47. I take it back, he's not a jerk, he's an ass.
48. Rich and Jake are my boyfriend and best friend, respectively.
49. Jake lives with me. He moved in the weekend we moved into the house. He was my husband's best friend.
50. Now he's mine. No we aren't sleeping together.
51. I'm sleeping with Rich.
52. Yeah, I'm a slut. Just ask my mother, she'll tell you.
53. Those two guys have been my rocks the last few months. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't be making this list. I wouldn't "be" anything. Except the opposite of alive.
54. I had something happen to me in July that almost destroyed me.
55. One of the worst things that can happen to a woman -- to anyone.
56. Yeah, that. It was painful. It was brutal. I would not wish it on Satan himself. The exam at the hospital was no better. The questioning from the police was almost worse.
57. While it was happening, I was hoping he would kill me. The next day I still wished he would have. Same for the next week.
58. A month later - no different. Two months -- can't say I wanted to die, but I didn't really want to live either.
59. I have to have an HIV test again next month, and  one every 6 months for the next year. I've already had 3. All were negative.
60. I'm grateful for that. Three more to go.
61. It's been 4 1/2 months. Living is tolerable. Death is no longer an option or a good idea now.
62. I'm grateful for that too.
63. I'm a writer. Not so long ago, I wouldn't have said that. Maybe I should say it again.
64. I'M A WRITER!!!! There. Seems more definate with CAPS, don't you think?
65. I have written 2 3/4 novels.
66. The first is being read by an agent right...now...
67. The second is in the last stages of final edits.
68. The third is more than halfway written.
69. The fourth is all...planned...out...in my head.
70. I published a book of personal essays called Moments of Clarity.
71. It was epublished.
72. Big mistake. I should have believed in myself more and tried to get it pubbed traditionally. But back then, I said "i think i might maybe, kinda sorta, perhaps wanna be a writer...if you don't mind...please..." , not "I'M A WRITER!!!"
73. The CAPS make all the difference.
74. When I get new plates for my car, they will say something about writing on them.
75. This is not the reason for the blog title.
76. I am a writer at my day job too. It's kinda boring -- I write  proposals for a healthcare provider.
77. A BIG healthcare provider.
78. Boring work, but the pay is good. Keeps me in my house. Keeps me, the Diva, the dogs , the rabbit and the cat in food and kibble.
79. We have 2 dogs: Ketulah, a 5 yo. boxer/black lab mix and Tobelone, a  6 month old chocolate lab; a cat named CJ (he's 3.5) and a rabbit (unnamed and I have no idea how old she is).
80. Actually only the dogs eat kibble. Well Tobelone eats whatever he can fit in his mouth. Yesterday is was one of my shoes. Today it was a plant. I'm just glad it hasn't been the rabbit or the cat.
81. I am left handed.
82. When I was in kindegarten, my "teacher" tried to make me right-handed. My mom came to school and put a stop to it.
83. Later that year, the same teacher made me sit in the "sad chair" because instead of taking a nap I was sitting at a table reading.
84. My mom came back to school.
85. My favorite color is red.
86. My birthday is on Valentine's Day. It's not as romantic and/or cute as you might think.
87. My first husband was a jerk too.
88. He beat the crap out of me, so I tossed, burned, broke up all his stuff and changed the locks.
89. He came back to the house and tried to break in. Three of my friends (all males) threw him a "blanket party" and then left him out in the woods naked to find his own way back.  Alledgedly.
90. He never bothered me again.
91. Some might wonder why I buried the reason for the name of the blog in the middle of the list.
92. I didn't want it to be the defining thing about me.
93. I play the clarinet, piano, saxophone, and flute.
94. I like to crochet and  bead on a loom.
95. I collect black and white cows.
96. I'm not the person I used to be, and I don't know who I will become, but I do know who I am for the first time in a long time.
97. I don't sweat the small stuff.
98. It's ALL small stuff.
99. I am the Phoenix rising from the ashes.
100. It's good to fly again.

Comments

[dejah]

Wow.

[Joyce A. Anthony]

Beautiful blog---this is my stopping point today so I left the comment here. Everything I've read makes me want to come back!!! Kim, I thought I knew you---now I'm glad I had this chance to know you a bit deeper!!! Hugs, Joyce

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